Patience

How could you.

How could you expect me to be as quick, as smart, as smooth as you are in it, when I’m only a beginner in this game, and you’re an expert?

My sensitive heart can’t take it. Public humiliation is too much to bear for me.

Why do you treat me this way?

And after swapping me out for someone else who’s quicker, smarter, and smoother, you compliment the group that played, saying that you “feel good” for that “fast game”. Right in front of me.

Why do you treat me this way?

Why can’t you consider how new I am to this version? Am I supposed to be apologetic for being slow? I really don’t see what’s wrong in taking your time un-learning and re-learning the same game but with different rules.

You make me want to cry. But I shan’t, because this small incident isn’t worth my precious tears. Still, my heart hurts. You can’t just attack me for being new/slow/dumb in an area I can never improve in without more time and more experience. What am I supposed to do to live up to your lofty expectations? I can’t do it.

I know it’s not ME you’re attacking, you’d do this for anyone slower than the speed threshold you’ve set for any player. It’s YOU. But it still doesn’t change the fact that your words hurt me. Perhaps I’m being TOO sensitive? OVERsensitive? But what the hell, do I have to justify my hurt? No, I don’t.

Sighs. 😦 Patience is a form of kindness too.

Advertisements